Just Got Fired? 10 Tips for Healing and Bouncing Back.

I’m a 32-year-old Black woman who owns a successful New York-based tech PR and media company in an industry predominantly run by white men. Before being my own boss, I worked in corporate America, and like many, I have been fired, laid off and pushed out of a lot of jobs.

Getting sacked was the best thing that ever happened to me. I persevered and it gave me the opportunity to look within and focus on myself and unique talents. So, if this recently happened to you, how do you bounce back and, most importantly, heal? Check out 10 tips that helped me get over being fired, land jobs with the biggest tech companies and ultimately quit corporate America for good. 

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What to Do After Getting Fired

If you get fired, first take a moment to breathe — it’s a tough moment. From there, follow these important steps:

Ask Questions

When facing a termination, it is important to ask questions. The most crucial one is why you are being fired. Although many companies aren’t legally required to provide answers to this question due to at-will employment law, some may still grant this request. 

You should also ask whether you will receive severance pay and when your health benefits will lapse. And if you maintain a good relationship with the employer, it can also be beneficial to ask for a letter of recommendation, especially if you believe it’ll help in your job search. 

Negotiate a Severance Package

When conducting layoffs, companies often provide affected employees with a severance package, which typically includes financial compensation and extended benefits. Companies may present them as a take-it-or-leave-it deal but, like any contract, severance packages can be negotiated. If a company believes you have a strong claim and wants to avoid unnecessary legal battles, they may be more willing to negotiate. 

Severance pay is the most important factor to try to negotiate, but you can seek other concessions as well. For example, you can ask for continued health services, career counseling or the removal of noncompete agreements. 

Grieve 

Once you’re home, cry, scream, laugh — and do it in that order, too. Believe me, you’ll feel better. Release whatever emotions you’re feeling in a safe and healthy way instead of trying to avoid them altogether. 

Losing a job is shocking and can cause us to doubt our gifts and abilities. It’s so important that you don’t allow this to happen. I made sure this never occurred if a job didn’t work out, and I’ve found that all three of these emotions have helped me address what happened in a way that wouldn’t allow me to beat myself up so badly. Laughing, crying and even screaming have been known to reduce stress, improve mood and reduce physical pain.

Take a Break From Social Media 

Now is not the time to be scrolling through endless feeds and comparing yourself to your peers. 

Social media is exhausting and pretty draining most of the time, which is why I made sure to unplug periodically after I lost my job. Your mental health should be your top priority, and finding peace of mind is possible when you aren’t spending hours of your day on social media. By doing this, you’ll get a ton of time back that you can apply to things of much more importance, like spending time with family or exploring the outdoors. 

Work Out and Take Time for Yourself

Even if you can’t seem to muster the energy to get out of bed or face the world after getting sacked, if you do one thing each day, work out or hit the gym. Sweat. Get your heart rate up and body moving. This is going to help you in ways you could never have imagined. You start to gain clarity and can work out your frustrations — and look great while doing it. Exercising increases positive thinking and releases endorphins, helping to stave off feelings like anxiety and depression. 

And if you can, go on vacation. Or just take a break from your everyday routine. If you lost your job, you will hopefully have a severance package and can treat yourself to a getaway to help refocus and recharge. 

Research Unemployment Benefits

During your downtime, you should also look into what unemployment benefits are available to you. These are handled at the state level, and each state has its own rules around eligibility, benefit amounts and duration. Begin by researching the benefits offered in the state where you worked, which, if you’re a remote worker, may be different from where you live. Be sure to keep track of application deadlines, and gather necessary information like employment history and your previous employer’s address to make the process smoother.

Rebuild Your Confidence

Losing your job should never have you questioning who you are and your impact. When one door closes, another one opens — always! This needs to be your mantra, not just for job hunting but for life in general.

Write down all of the things you love about yourself and your proudest achievements, both professionally and personally. It’s good to see this list and be reminded of it constantly so nothing eats away or chips at your self-esteem. I’ve seen people do a total transformation and get a new haircut or switch up their entire wardrobe for an added boost. Start thinking positively about yourself, remove all self-doubt and believe in what you can bring to the table.

Renew Yourself

Think of getting laid off as a time for new beginnings! This is a chance for you to make changes that you might not have expected but that you need, and will benefit you in the long run. Find ways to transform and let go of what happened.Be present, and focus on the now and what you can control. Don’t let one job loss make you feel stuck — you’re not. Use this opportunity to reinvent yourself and what you hope to accomplish. 

Update Your Resume

Once you’re in a good headspace, take some time to update your resume with your most recent work experience, along with any social media profiles and business networks you’re a part of. You should also start thinking about the types of roles you’d like to pursue next and, if you feel up to it, reading a few job descriptions — this will give you a good sense for how to tailor your resume to what employers are looking for. 

Reflect on your responsibilities and accomplishments in your last role, and consider how they can relate for the role you're going after. This time is also a good opportunity to remove outdated or irrelevant information from your resume. 

Make a Plan 

Plot, scheme and map out your next step and how you’re going to reenter the workforce. Without a set plan or structure on what you’re looking to do with your next career move, you’ll most likely end up in a similar situation — getting fired or hating the job you shouldn’t have accepted.

I like to create vision boards that allow me to identify what I want to achieve, how I’m going to get it done and most importantly, when. Make this a fun exercise you do consistently, not just after you lose your job. You always want to make sure you are staying on course with your goals. Use those countless hours of strategizing that you applied working in corporate America to yourself. 

Lean on Your Network 

When all else fails, your network — those relationships and connections you’ve built over time — can be one of your greatest assets in helping you take your career to the next level. A lot of my references, referrals and current clients came from those I have worked with in the past and from jobs that didn’t last long. While working for corporate America, you are often able to build meaningful relationships and interact with some of the brightest minds in the industry. Just recently, I even hugged the CEO who fired me years ago as we agreed to partner and tap my services. You never know how those relationships will come back around. 

Start Applying and Be Persistent 

Be selective about which roles you apply for, and stay consistent to make real progress. Remember: A bunch of people are also on the job hunt, so you have to be patient. Just think of it as a numbers game and make it a part of you daily routine. For the companies that are on your wishlist, don’t hesitate to reach out directly through professional networks to inquire about the role, your interest in it and the application process.

Don’t get discouraged if you don’t hear back right away or you get some rejections. If something is meant for you, it will come. Don’t force it.

Don’t Rush Into a Job

One thing I wish I had done differently after being fired was not rush into finding a job immediately after the fact. I was desperate to get a new gig, only for a paycheck. After all, I live in New York City and have bills to pay. But I regret giving in to this urgency, working for companies and taking roles that 100 percent kept me from reaching my long-term goals. Don’t make this mistake.It is so important to follow the above step and take time to allow the dust to settle from the situation and not say yes to the first thing that comes your way. Evaluate your reasoning for acting too quickly. And unless this new job is necessary experience you need for your dream position, it’s best to just wait. 

Realize That a Job Doesn’t Define You 

You are so much more than a job. Jobs come and go, they should be looked at as a stepping stone to get you to where you ultimately want to be. Stop confusing something you do with who you are. 

Working for corporate America, I would put too much attention on helping companies that weren’t mine scale and build their dream, so I started to shift that thinking inward. When I first got fired, I landed my own client afterwards. That ignited my side business, which alone made me realize that the skills that I developed working at these toxic companies could be leveraged elsewhere and for myself.

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