As we become more cognizant of inclusivity in the workplace, leadership teams often look for after work activities that don’t revolve around alcohol. But what leadership should be doing is not asking their employees to do anything outside of work hours at all.
3 Management Tips for Creating Better After-Work Events
- Listen and notice.
- Be inquisitive.
- Share.
Why After-Work Events Don’t Work
After work events shouldn’t be a frequent occurrence for several reasons. First, these events don’t actually serve their intended purpose of building employee relationships and camaraderie. Instead, they’re stressful for employees, who have to figure out the logistics of being away from their families or the potential anxiety of socializing with others outside of work. Resentment can build toward the company as employees have to give more of their free time to work, for which they aren’t compensated.
Finding an activity that employees of all ages can do and will like is also challenging. Often, these events favor younger employees because they’ve been tasked with planning them. This can make older employees feel excluded. Worse, if alcohol is present and an employee engages too liberally and behaves in an unprofessional manner or says something offensive, their team dynamics become strained. Ideally, however, people’s behavior outside of the office should have nothing to do with their actual jobs.
Additionally, occasional evenings out are not going to fix a team’s core dysfunction. Problems in employee dynamics are the product of poor management. Common issues arise from hiring people for job roles they’re unsuited for, requiring employees to do things outside their job descriptions, or failing to take interpersonal disagreements and conflicts seriously when brought to their attention.
Leadership looks to HR to help them figure out how to manage teams or establish rules for doing so. This can lead to a cold, generic work culture that doesn’t take the specific needs of the people who work there, even if the company’s values claim otherwise. So, people feel disconnected from each other, their organizations, and ultimately feel they’re easily replaceable.
Building a good work culture and fostering strong connections between employees is actually simpler than leadership feels it is. Doing so does take time and effort, however, and can’t be outsourced. If done well, though, the long-term benefits of a highly functioning team are invaluable. Because you are learning to manage by relationship.
Better Events Start Here
So how is this done? Three simple steps.
1. Listen and Notice
Listen to absolutely everything, from the small talk before the Zoom meeting starts to the bigger issues people bring to you. Listen to all sides of a conversation and evaluate how people talk about these things. Are they excited, scared or indifferent? Notice if others have more to say about an issue but have been cut off. Watch interpersonal dynamics between team members.
Not sure how to do this? Start by encouraging all team members to contribute their thoughts via email or in a meeting even if they go against the popular view. Then notice how easy or hard it is for them to do this and the reactions of their peers. You’ll start to see dynamics and personalities emerge.
2. Be Inquisitive
Ask people to say more to get as many details about everything as you can and as is appropriate. Give people time, space and encouragement to say what they need to say. If you don’t have the time, make an appointment with them to show that you’re interested, you care and you understand that what they have to say is important.
Ask people to play out scenarios they’re talking about. For example, if an employee comes to you saying they’re worried about a deadline, have them explain to you what they think will happen if they miss it, in detail (e.g., “So-and-so will be mad” would warrant additional questioning: “So then what?”). You’ll be able to understand the true underlying issues and, maybe more importantly, the feelings behind the issues.
When appropriate, ask people how they’re feeling. Ask about specific work issues, working in general, the baseball game. This shows you care and will also give you insight into who they are, their personalities and how they might interact with other members of the team.
Always be available, even if doing so is terribly inconvenient, while also making clear you don’t expect your employees to do the same. People will feel you’re on their side.
3. Share
Let people know you’ve heard them. Validate their experience even if you don’t understand it or can’t do anything to help. Let them know you appreciate their honesty and talent, even if they’re failing. Remember, everyone has emotional strengths and weaknesses, but everyone likewise wants to be understood and feel connected to others.
Not only will your teams start functioning better, but you’ll notice your employees will also be more likely to go out of their way for extra assignments. People do things for other people they know, like and care about. And the only way that will happen in a workplace is if leadership respects their employees’ time and cares enough to ask questions.
And if an outing is absolutely necessary, let your employees choose through an anonymous Google form. You’ll be surprised by the great ideas they come up with. And make sure the activity is on company time.
