How to Speak So Your Coworkers Actually Listen

You could hear a pin drop in the classroom. Standing next to the whiteboard was our fifth-grade history teacher, Ms. Liu.

“Who was Abraham Lincoln’s vice president?” she asked the class again.

That semester, we were learning about U.S. history, and Ms. Liu posed a question to the entire classroom that no one seemed to want to answer. I had an idea what the answer might be, but there was no way I was raising my hand. I glanced down at the paper on my desk to not draw attention to myself.

But from the corner of my eye, I could see Ms. Liu scanning the room looking for someone to call on. I kept my eyes down, hoping she would pass me by.

“Please don’t call my name,” I thought as I stared blankly at my desk.

“Jessica,” she said. My body froze. “Do you know the answer?”

I looked up, startled, my eyes wide.

“Um,” I said. “I am not sure, but maybe—”

“Speak louder,” Ms. Liu said.

“Um, Andrew Johnson?” I responded.

“Your voice is too soft. We can’t hear you. Please speak up!”

“Andrew Johnson,” I repeated louder. I could feel my face getting bright red.

“That’s right.”

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Why Do We Go Quiet?

For many years, my “soft voice” was a frequent topic of discussion. Teachers, aunts and uncles would often say I was too soft-spoken, and it was hard for them to hear me.

This wasn’t entirely a surprise because I knew where my soft voice came from. It was my gut reaction to when people would look at me and I wanted to redirect their gaze.

To be clear, just because we come from a Quiet Culture, it doesn’t mean we all are naturally soft-spoken. Many of us speak just fine and people can hear us well, but the uncomfortable feeling of being put on the spot is the same.

When we are the center of attention, many of us find our speaking changes. We talk fast or softly, or we end our sentences in an upward tone, just to punt the conversation off to someone else.

In my case, I didn’t like the spotlight, and I certainly didn’t think much about adjusting my tone. In my mind, I figured that if I could write the correct answer on paper and do the work well, that was all that mattered.

What Makes an Influential Speaker?

Fast-forward 10 years later and I was now an intern in a Loud Culture newsroom. Everything I knew about tone was turned upside down when I heard my colleagues speak on-air.

In the office, the environment was as you’d expect it: loud — TVs blaring, people shouting across the room, the constant clicking of keyboard keys and the never-ending ringing of calls coming into the station.

But when the clock hit the top of the news hour, everything in the room screeched to a halt because the hourly newscast would begin. Instead of the commotion, the deep, commanding voices of the anchors and reporters would radiate through the room.

As a young intern immersing myself in this environment, I was captivated by the richness and variety of tone used by the anchors and reporters. They all talked with an intentionality that created resonance.

For months, I tried to decipher what it was about their voices that made them so easy to listen to. How were they so clear, and how did they alter their voices so fluidly that every word had the right pitch, inflection and tonality?

After a few months of interning at the TV station, the answer to how they did it started to crystallize. Each person’s speaking voice was deliberate. Each word had purpose, and every dip, lift or pause had intent. As a person coming from a Quiet Culture, I found this intentionality in speaking striking.

I had never realized there was such a musical element to voice, and the way those on TV used this element was fascinating. It wasn’t about their speaking loudly or a lot, it was how they used their voices that mattered. It was as if each person could alter the energy of the room by just controlling the tone of their voice.

Some of the most influential communicators have a speaking tone that is undeniably dynamic. We know it when we hear it, because their tone is easy to listen to, clear and commanding. An influential speaker may not say much, but when they do talk, others listen.

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What Are the 5 Tonal Elements of Our Voice?

To be the kind of communicator others want to listen to, we have to learn the fundamentals of tone, because it can either compel people to stay engaged or make them disengage.

Think about it this way: when we listen to music, sometimes we skip a song because the musical notes or pitch don’t call to us. Or more pointedly, we tune out people’s talking when they speak in a monotone voice for an extended period of time.

As humans, we tune out sounds we don’t like, consciously and unconsciously. However, in the working world, when we speak, our intention is for others to listen. This includes when we present to a group, talk about our work or even ask for what we want.

We want people to pay attention. So how can we maximize our chances of this happening? According to Dr. Wendy LeBorgne, a voice pathologist, communications consultant and TEDx speaker, there are five tonal elements that make up the sound of our voice.

1. Frequency: The pitch of one’s voice, which can be either high or low. Men typically have lower pitches and women higher pitches.
2. Rate: The pace of our speaking. When people get nervous, they tend to speak fast. But when someone speaks too slowly, they can seem unenthused.
3. Intensity: The volume of our voice. A loud voice can be perceived as aggressive or yelling. But if a voice is too soft, it can signal shyness or low energy.
4. Inflection: The fluid upward and downward trend of our voice. Those with a consistent downward inflection can sound monotone, and those with an upward inflection can sound unsure.
5. Quality: The innate sound of our voice, whether it is raspy, hoarse, nasal and so on. It is unique to us and is how people know it’s us when we answer the phone. Each person’s vocal quality is different.

Of the five elements, the last one, quality, is the only one we cannot change. If you think about it, who are some of the most recognizable actors and actresses out there? You know them because of the quality of their voice.

For example, Morgan Freeman’s voice is iconic because of its deep timbre. Meryl Streep’s voice has a resonant quality to it, because her intonations can be soft. And Awkwafina, aka Nora Lum, has a lower-pitched, raspy voice.

All three are distinctive and unique. According to LeBorgne, this distinctiveness is what makes us distinguishable.

When thinking about how we can use our tone of voice at work to draw people in when we speak, we need to focus on the four modifiable elements: frequency, rate, intensity and inflection.

Excerpted from Smart Not Loud: How to Get Noticed at Work for All the Right Reasons by Jessica Chen, in agreement with Portfolio, an imprint of Penguin Publishing Group, a division of Penguin Random House LLC. Copyright © Jessica Chen, 2024.